Title: Star Wars: Dark Side of the Force Part 1 Company/Director: 3-d Movie Corporation/Paw Print Productions/Jason Woolford (i think) Genre: Fuck if I know; it's a boring movie, that's it. It's kinda short... Reviewed by MidbackMan Scale: 5 to 10: Very Bad A film of just terrible Quality; Don't bother 11 to 20: Bad A few slightly redeeming qualities but still not worth your time 21 to 30: It's okay Very ordinary technical stats; Not worthless but not great 31 to 40: Good Above average; Usually recommended to the fan of the specific genre 41 to 50: Very Good Well worth your attention; Content and design are spectacular Review: I was pretty stoked to be downloading a Star Wars movie in 3dmm. I've seen others adaptations of the movies before and have been disappointed but I thought maybe FINALLY someone had done the title justice and made something decent to watch. I mean, how hard can it be to make a good Star Wars movie? There's already legions of fans who love any Star Wars related shit out there and a movie, done right, could be an awesome. There's tons of great Star Wars music online for anyone to download, so that aspect of the movie would be taken care of already. All one would need is some fast action to go with it, some cool lightsaber effects and sounds, and of course the addition of any currently known Star Wars lore would surely be a big plus for all the nerds out there who would get so excited at the sight of a well known Star Wars character they'd automatically give this movie a 5 star rating. Anyone reading this would've probably already gone to the bottom and checked the scores. They're not that good. After watching this whole thing I've decided on two things: 1. This movie takes itself WAY too seriously. The credits for instance, they're five miles long and feature about a names of people who I suppose are either made up or are people from the credits of some other Star Wars movie... Everything from "Construction" to "software development" (whatever the fuck that is. director - did you take these from a game?). Note to Director: NO ONE watches credits. Maybe if there's a really good song someone might sit through the credits or some cool animations but these are just really long and stupid credits that end up being longer than the whole movie itself, i bet. AND SPEAKING OF MUSIC, oh my god, the fool used MIDIS! Okay, my sound card is pretty good so the MIDIS sounded okay but yours may suck and these could sound HORRIBLE! I HATE MIDIs and I wish people would stop using them for good! Anyway, cuz my sound card is cool, like I said, they sounded alright. One problem with 'em: they drowned out the voices! And there's problem number 3. The acting. It was stale, stupid, boring, and every other word I can think of that's bad. MAYBE, just maybe it would've been okay if I could hear more of it, but instead we're stuck with mumbling poofter talk "yer lightsaber skills are almost com-mumble mumble mumble... And onto problem number four. Well, since I can't understand what's going on because all of the bad acting is drowned out by MIDIS that constantly play throughout the movie, I couldn't understand the story! Good thing it's short enough. Of all of this, to make it worse the animation is only sub-par and the lightsaber battle in it is slow and what some may call just plain poo. There are some cool looking droids and stuff but their movements seem clunky. I'd blame 3dmm but something caused me to change that position. The scenery. It's AMAZING! Everywhere, it's full of really awesomely done scenery that does look and remind me of the movie (in a 3dmm sort of way)! And to add to that, the two main characters go up into the Jedi Council's main chamber (that place Yoda sat in during Star Wars: Episode 1) and all of the Jedi Council are hand made animated characters, including Yoda, that old bald white dude, and that long-necked green dude... I don't know their names but they're sweetly done and animated wicked well. Also, in addition to the cool scenery, although I said the animation was pretty clunky, I think the angles and the views the Director chose were really good and showed some skill with Directing a movie. If the Director fixes some shit in his series I'd wanna watch some more. It's certainly the best Star Wars movie I've seen in 3dmm. Ummm, well, i guess that's not saying much actually since the only Star Wars movies I've seen in 3dmm were a shitty Tony Teulan ripoff of Episode 1 and some preview for Trek Wars I saw a long time ago that looked kinda cool but never caught when it was released. Oh, & if Dustin Guest isn't around anymore and isn't going to make HIS Star Wars movie then this I'm sure will be a perfect substitute. Here's hoping with the room this director has to improve in his sequels that he does. Story/Flow: 3/10 Animation: 5/10 Scenery: 10/10 Voices: 2/10 Music: 7/10 Total: 27/50 The Movies Highs: *Scenery is awesome *The hand-made characters are also awesome The Movies Lows: *Everything else Bottom Line: It's pretty blah, but honestly, to see the scenery and hand made Yoda - those alone make it worth downloading since it's not that big of a file. NOTE TO READER: Take notice that the technical scores are just that: Technical Scores. The review will contain an opinion of how enjoyable the movie was overall. The Tech Scale may not reflect the opinions in the written review. As always if you agree or disagree with any of the opinions or technical scores in this article please feel free NOT to take it up with MidbackMan or the management of Review Central since no one really gives a rats ass about what you have to say. That's why you're at this site.